Love wasn't possible in just a couple of days. Love could be set in motion quickly, but TRUE LOVE needed time to grow into something strong and enduring.
Love was, above all, about spending years with a certain person would create something greater than the sum of what the two could accomplish separetely. Over time, however, could show whether you'd been accurate in your judgement.

Women are a lot less complicated than what most man think they are. Women want the fairy tale. Not all women, of course, but most women grow up dreaming about the kind of men who would risk everything for them, even knowing they might get hurt.

It is typical of women to be a bit more paranoid than men. Men seemed immue to these sort of insecurities. Even if they weren't, they'd learned to either disguise their feelings or bury them deep enough so as not to be crippled(affected) by them.


WOMEN. *shrugs.

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Wooden Heart
Originally by Elvis Presley

Can't you see I love you
Please don't break my heart in two
That's not hard to do
'Cause I don't have a wooden heart

And if you said good-bye
Then I know that I would cry
Maybe I would die
'Cause I don't have a wooden heart

There's no strings about this love of mine
It was always you from the start
Treat me nice, treat me good
Treat me like you know you should
'Cause I'm not made of wood
And I don't have a wooden heart

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Anyway, an interesting quote I got online :
"When he is late for dinner and I know he must either be having an affair or lying dead in the street, I always hope he is dead." -- Judith Viorst

And yeah, FUCK MEN!!!

aha. just kidding.

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"God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the same time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out"
-from First Corinthains Chapter 10.

I always like that verse.
It reminds me of the footprints story - the one where God walks with man on the beach. Scenes from the man's life flash in the sky, and during flashbacks of the most trying times of the man's life, he sees only one set of footprints. Not because God abandoned the man in times of need. But because God carried the man.

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Dreams are always crushing when they don't come true.
But it's the simple dreams that are often the most painful.
Because they seem so personal, so reasonable, so attainable.
You're always close enough to touch, but never quite close enough to hold,
and it's enough to break your heart.

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Quote of the day:
"Just as a relationship can spiral steeply downward, it can also spiral upward - particularly when given knowledge, skill, goodwill - and a willing partner."
~ Lori H. Gordon

In the wake of those memories, I've come to realise that I now have the answer to the questions that I'd been pondering. Yes, I decided, a man can truly change.

The events of the past year have taught me much about myself, and a few universal truths. I learned, for, instance, that while wounds can be inflicted easily upon those we love, it's often much more difficult to heal them. Yet the process of healing those wounds provided the richest experience of my life, leading me to believe that while I've overestimated what I could accomplish in a day, I had underestimated what I could do in a year.

But most of all, I learned that it's possible for two people to fall in love over again, even when there's been a lifetime of disappointment between them.

I must admit that being romantic still doesn't come easily even for me, myself.
It's a daily struggle to reinvent myself, and part of me wonders whether it always will be. But so what? I hold on tightly to the lessons I have learnt about love and keeping it alive, and even if I never become a true romantic, it doesn't mean that I'm ever going to stop trying. (:

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HE* - whoever he might be in the future. for now, just let HIM* be my imaginery friend.

He's after all, the kind of person I always wished to be. While I tend towards stoicism and logic, he is outgoing and kind, with a natural empathy that endears him to others. He laughs easily and has a wide circle of friends. Had he not come into my life, I sometimes think that I would have led the life of a monk (ok. in this case nun)

There's more, too: I'm charmed by the fact that he has always displayed his emotions with childlike ease. When he's happy, he laughs, when he's annoyed, he whines. In those moments, there's an ageless innocence about him. Sometimes when he's daydreaming, I'll ask him what he's thinking about and he'll suddenly begin speaking in giddy tones about something I've long forgotten. This, I must say, has never ceased to amaze me.

While He has been blessed with the most tender of hearts, in many ways he's stronger than I am. The confidence that he has is something that I've found elusive, and above all else, I envy this about him. ((:

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"I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut...And my scars remind me that the past is real...I tear my heart open just to feel..."

Is it possible, I wonder, for a man(women) to truly change? Or do character and habit form the immovable boundaries of our lives?

In the course of my previous relationship, I've been selfish and stubborn and as ignorant as a goldfish, and it pains me to realise this about myself. Of course, all relationships go through ups and downs, and I believe this is the natural consequences of couples that choose to stay together over the long haul.

Of course, I didn't blame Jason for the path our relationship had taken. Things just werent going on smoothly. I have to admit that Jason's never been quite the person I wanted him to be, I know it even from the beginning of our relationship. For instance, I wished that he was more romantic, they way my dad had been with my mum.

My dad was the kind of man who would hold my mum's hand in the hours after dinner or spontaneously pick a bouquest of flowers on his way home from work. Even as a child, I was enthralled by my parents' romance.

Jason just seemed to find romance a difficult concept, he just didnt have an understand of what it takes to make another's heart start fluttering. He's steady, yes. Dependable, absolutely. Faithful, without a doubt. But romance, I hate to admit, was as foreign to him as giving birth. That's why we ended.

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